Dark storm clouds in rose twilight skies, mapping silver lined edges of a trauma created world. Before you see me, I’ve already memorized his eyes in place of yours, tragically distant & reflecting a familiar, conditioned cold. I can’t trust anything or anyone without falling into a place drawn masterfully by wordless terror. My mind keeps running internal defective scripts, but my heart can’t seem to resolve the fatal systematic error.

To love myself…is no easy path & my self defenses have a cure for my emotions. Years & years of denying the truth, my scared & shattered self is beneath infinite waves of unseen, protected oceans.

You can tell me it’s safe to finally be free. But you don’t know the secrets & pain subconsciously washing through every one of my memories.

Let go… let go…

My feelings push & pull on overgrown cornerstone walls to fearlessly overflow.

How do I learn not to see a villain in everyone I meet?

How do I look within to feel in every way complete?

My inner child holds fast to a make believe story of safety, as my adult self drives in destructive tendencies. I have to unite them both in harmony to find a way towards peace. To my trembling soul I whisper, please, it’s time for you to heal yourself, piece by piece.

 

Posted by:Lauren Kim

🦋 I write my own stories, breathing in life & love by my heart's endless daydreams.

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