In my mind…I create the most beautiful of dreams & darkest of nightmares. My imagination runs wild, calmly composed under the mask I can’t help but wear. By the time reason catches reality, I am a million miles from where I need to be.
I smile in the fragile light of hope…until that light begins to flicker & silently fade. Doubt settles in too comfortably, sits back & whispers to me, my fate has already been permanently made.
Wings pinned to the truth, tears pull me down to the ground. I’m my own worst enemy on a good day, anxiety & depression filling up the room with suffocating, suppressive sound.
It’s impossible, give up, & save yourself from another heart break.
Words drowning out any clarity, everything I have said & done, it’s all a mistake.
Let me sleep for a while & don’t let the memory awake.
Sometimes it hurts to dream. The words beginning to leave me.
I close my eyes,
Searching for clarity.