I don’t know how to process…the loss of you.
You were abusive.
You were cruel.
You were controlling.
You were also kind.
You were also human.
You were also broken.
But to a daughter, you were supposed to be my hero.
Instead, you were…someone else.
When you left and our family broke apart…
I stopped believing in everyone.
Despite all we went through, it didn’t compare to not having you there.
Even when I know it’s not my fault, I can’t fathom it.
You treated us like trash…only to throw us all away in the end.
I can’t handle it at times.
But it’s getting better day by day.
I’ll never understand how a father can leave his child…not like that.
It digs into me and it leaves me with loss.
Yet I know…
Sometimes it’s better to be alone than be around someone who…can’t love you.
Who makes you feel empty and worthless.
Love is such a curse.
And a blessing.
Your last words to me…
Threw so much hate and harm it left me speechless.
Still cried over losing you.