it takes time and patience to know someone…
to see past their facade and love the person underneath.
appreciating every unique quality and gift they alone bring.
growing up…he loved being the one in control.
installing fear to produce a desired outcome.
even if it meant…putting you in a box.
telling you who he wanted you to be.
in this way…
I lost myself before I truly knew the real person
underneath.
full of judgements and…
harsh criticism..
and…
expectations.
I had to justify…argue…fight…for any ground.
but in this way…you still play his games.
he’s still the one you go around and around.
but people….
they’re complex and beautiful.
not a possession.
not an obsession.
if I learned anything from him…
it would be that people aren’t meant for imprisoning…
his need for control was driven by his own fears…
so it’s my choice now…
and his shadows are dramatically lessening…
I don’t have to live with the fear he did…
when I look back at the end of my days…
I want to fully love the life I chose to live.
