why can’t I love you?
why is it so hard…..
why can’t I accept you?
why do I treat you without regard….
I used to close my eyes to hate you….
and lied to myself to just get through….
I was never loved for who I was….
they put me down and controlled me just because….
when I’m sad my tears never reach the end…
and when I’m hurting I’ll smile and pretend….
fighting myself in battles you started long before….
I still fear the pain of always needing more….
He didn’t love me….
She didn’t protect me…
and I struggle to do for me what they failed to do….
and I forget all my fears….
when I see you…
Lauren Kim Art 