here

underneath the fear….

beneath the tears….

is a panic that runs wild and uncontrolled….

any hint…

any indication of change….

spikes the fear of death in me…

because this was how I survived….

this was how I made it through….

but it took a fatal cost….

and the more I hold onto the past…

the more I’ll come to regret what I lost….

I’m afraid…

I’m terrified….

It grips my whole self…

It blacks out all the rest….

But I can’t stay in this panic….

No, I can’t live here…

Tearing down the walls slowly….

Growth and flowers left in the fallen

Years….