I don’t want to want me… When wanting you… Somehow became everything… I don’t love me… When loving you was everything… But this love is … Cold… And destroys the best of me… No, this love is… Isn’t like love at all…
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What do I do without your love… What do I do without your validation… Without your approval… Without your…
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I thought having your love would be enough… But your love without my own… Could never fill my cup… The more I chased after you… The more it felt like it could never… Be enough…
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When you didn’t want me… I didn’t want me… When you didn’t love me… I didn’t love me… When you didn’t care for me… I didn’t care for me… You were my world… I just mirrored everything you said and did… Everything you said and did…
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I wanted you to need me…. So I could forget how much I needed me… I wanted you to love me… So I could forget how much I needed to love me… I played out this movie in my head… A thousand… A million times… And you were there… And I wanted… You to care……
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I lived in a fantasy world… And I didn’t want to leave…. I could close my eyes… And escape reality…. In this world I was loved and adored perfectly… But in this world…this version of “love” was never free… I shut off my heart and closed off my emotions… A fake smile and rehearsed laughter…kept…
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Lauren Kim Art 