I lived in a fantasy world…
And I didn’t want to leave….
I could close my eyes…
And escape reality….
In this world I was loved and adored perfectly…
But in this world…this version of “love” was never free…
I shut off my heart and closed off my emotions…
A fake smile and rehearsed laughter…kept me repeating old motions…
Walls and walls…masqueraded as protection…
The mind and heart are beautifully flawed inventions…
Love in this world was cardboard and thin…
But fear…
Fear knew me too well and always seemed to win….
I thought fighting the pain and hiding it away was best…
This method of surviving never gave me any rest…
No matter what I did real life kept knocking at my door….
The sound grew until I was unable to ignore….
Fantasy could never fill the hole within my heart and soul…
Only love from within…
Could heal the damage fear had and erase the toll…
I fought it…I denied it…
But eventually I gave in….
I let myself love myself a little by little…
And a new journey begins…
Fear has smoke and mirrors, effortlessly creating a dark picture…
But love…
Love will always make life far more beautiful and richer…