he wouldn’t…

he wouldn’t like it if I spoke too loudly…. no, he didn’t like the noise… he wouldn’t have wanted me to speak my mind… no, he preferred me quietly playing with simple toys… he wouldn’t have approved if I pursued my art… no, it wasn’t a sensible or practical choice…. he wouldn’t have loved me…

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more

He wasn’t perfect… No, not even close… He wanted to be the king in a world of glamour and grandiose… I ran away from the pain until the tears kept falling… Tried to deny the truth but it wouldn’t stop calling… He failed to love me so I… Couldn’t love anyone for a long time……

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away

He did the best he could… The best he could… Sometimes believing in a lie is easier than swallowing the truth… Acceptance is a strange thing… I always thought I needed his approval…his validation… But… I needed to accept the love he could give…. And the love he couldn’t… The pain he gave… I tried…

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knife

I stayed a lifetime in a dream… Hid my secrets and pain beneath golden lined buttons and perfect little seams… In your eyes I saw my world and every spinning, shining star…. I would have traded everything I have, just to be exactly where you are… But the love you give… It takes away my…

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loving way

Oh I was just a child…. And you were… Everything to me…. But I never knew… The whole time… You were holding your scars over my eyes… Until your pain was all I could ever see… I don’t hate you… I don’t hold anything against you… But the bad memories stay… Instead of reaching out…

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stay

I don’t want you to leave…. No, I don’t want you to go… You say…. You love me more than I could ever truly know…. But you’re there… And I’m here… No one ever promised… Love and life would be fair…. But you could be ten thousand miles away…. And I would count all the…

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