why can’t you love me…
why can’t you care…
why do I obsess over all the ways life just isn’t fair…
why can’t you change…
why can’t I simply disengage…
why can’t you see my tears…
why do you hide behind your ego’s fears….
why am I still here…
why do I desperately need you to finally care…
why do I cling onto the hope you will one day….
make all the pain and hurt go away…
why do I see your face in everyone I meet…
why do I walk away from you and always feel the weight of defeat…
why do I cry out your name in the middle of the night…
why do I still believe you will be the one to make this all alright…
why are you the one I need to fix me…
why did I blindly believe in a fantasy….
why do you turn away again and again coldly…
why do I continue to scream and shout and break down so you could finally see….
why do I…
why do I need you to see worth in me…
why do I want you to break free….
why do I hold onto this fallen, broken dream…
why do I convince myself you aren’t the abusive person I know you don’t want to be…
why do I create this impossible reality…
why do I cry out for you to finally….finally see…
me..
Lauren Kim Art 