Unloved You

All these years… Counted memories and tears… My heart wanted only to unlove you…. But that’s something I could never do… Numb my self… Addictions do no help… Because once you love someone…. It just can’t be… Undone… You left us long ago… For reasons I cannot fathom or fully know… But it shattered our…

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Free

Anxiety and dread… Always in the background… Both hungry… Always needing to be fed… So many thoughts… Won’t have peace when I lay in bed.. It’s too quiet and calm… My heart chooses chaos instead… A struggle to maintain… But yesterdays all begin to blur and feel the same strain… Healthy can be so hard…

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Waves

A part of me hates the lows.. Running always from the pain.. But you can’t have sunshine and butterflies.. Without the growth and a little rain… A storm of emotions when I remember the past… The brightest of moments seem to fade and fall away so fast… It’s okay to let the sorrow in to…

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Tear

Most days are good… Even if my mind runs through the could and shoulds… But there are times that hit me hard in the heart… And the emotional intensity paralyzes me in the pain of feeling like I’m right back at the start… I can never forget how far I’ve come but when the sorrow…

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Hate & Love

Hate wears a beautiful facade… Passionate and elusive… She knows every tiny crime… And keeps record of each injustice… She paints her lips in self righteousness.. And combs her hair with disdain… And every day… And every night… She does it all again… Hate holds on desperately to… A feeling of twisted connection… She won’t…

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Shades

In his distant eyes I saw… Pain I longed to heal… Too dependent I… Let his feelings become the ones I would feel… And for so long I could memorize his name as I slowly forgot my own… I knew every single slight difference in his voice and words and tones… Abuse is so deadly…

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