All these years…

Counted memories and tears…

My heart wanted only to unlove you….

But that’s something I could never do…

Numb my self…

Addictions do no help…

Because once you love someone….

It just can’t be…

Undone…

You left us long ago…

For reasons I cannot fathom or fully know…

But it shattered our family…

And now…

Years later I can finally see…

You were a broken man who lived fearfully….

One who couldn’t face his own struggles and terrified so many parts of me…

Still…

Loving someone who harms you takes lifetimes to heal…

When you have to feel everything you couldn’t let yourself ever fully feel…

I miss the love you never gave…

So long I want you to be the one to save…

Me…

But now I can only save myself from you…

The saying always goes…

To your own heart…

Be faithfully true…

And for the first time in my life…

I give to myself the love I needed but never received…

I cherish my life and love and dreams…

My hopes…

And all I could ever believe…

Posted by:Lauren Kim

🦋 I write my own stories, breathing in life & love by my heart's endless daydreams.

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