Never

Used to numb myself just so I couldn’t feel the pain…. But life is a little darker when you take away both the sunshine and the rain… My mind goes to a place where it finds an escape from the every day… Repeated patterns… They always are ready and willing to forever stay… But in…

Read More

Glamorize

The mind likes to paint such priceless pictures… And in everyone of them… An illusion of perfection was all I saw…. A life of… Pure fantasy…. One that could never be… Real…. Sometimes we lie to our own hearts… We bathe in regrets… We glamorize the past… But now I know… Real love… Isn’t wanting…

Read More

Life

I want to run away sometimes… Thinking it will be easier this way… But the pain and the tears follow… And pretending they don’t exist… Allows the memories to remain… Long past their stay…. Life is pain… Life is heartbreak… But escaping…. Doesn’t heal the traumas… Numbing won’t make the triggers stop… So I lean…

Read More

Wrong

I was a fool… To ever walk away and leave you… A million miles apart… But you were… The only one here in my heart… I never meant to hurt you… Never meant for things to go this far… But you will always be my world… No matter where we both are… And I still…

Read More

Home

I kept searching for a place to call home… In people… In fantasies… In everything outside of me…. Wanting only to fill the void within… But along the way… Of broken hearts and loves… I couldn’t ever find it outside of me… A completeness… A wholeness… To feel fully loved and cared for…. A place…

Read More

karma

karma always has a way… of coming back around…. when you feel like you’re free of consequences… it brings you back to the ground…. and back then… all I cared about was the attention I received… but I never could guess…. I was the one being strung along and deceived… my own ego… my own…

Read More

just

just give me your love… as if… our heart beats were one… and take me to a loving place… where our story somehow beat all odds and beautifully won… because I can’t even imagine one day… without you there… my memories… holding to the future we no longer share… I was selfish… I was lost……

Read More

everything

I wanted… Everything… Sunshine and gold… But when your attention is elsewhere… You never cherish the love you hold… And it was selfish of me to think…. You’d always be there when… Our love was shattered in a blink… And I disappeared in day dreams when I ran from the pain…. Pain in a heavy…

Read More

perfect

in my mind it could never be perfect…. fantasy and delusions come from the fallout of emptiness & neglect…. but I don’t want to be the person I once was…. staying in familiar patterns when comfort was easy because…. I set myself up to fail every time when I choose fear…. insecurities and pain always…

Read More

Sabotage

I end any chance I have for love… Before it begins… Because my heart knows… Love always ends… And these self defenses have been with me for as long as I can remember… For so long fighting to be alone…. When all this time… I needed love the most… So long pretending… I didn’t need…

Read More