plans

life is never… a perfectly laid plan… and it never quite lives in expectations and demands…. control and fear love to run the show… but there’s a certain peace and kindness they both will never know…

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say

say I’m the only one on your mind… if you have to leave… just be kind… forget me in love letters… I keep telling myself to find someone better…. but is this really the end…. when we no longer care… the love and innocence in our hearts… begins to tear…

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lessons

loss teaches the most painful lessons… tragedy takes away it all… then makes you see the blessings… and I just wish it was all a dream I could wake up…. the time we had together… it just wasn’t long enough… but I throw it all away… now all I can think of… are all the…

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okay

pretending for a moment… we could be okay… that some word or action could undo it all… as if hearts could capture time… replaying ever painful word… refeeling every wound… seconds into hours into years…. but no one but me knows these shattered tears…

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forget us

never wanted to forget us…. never wanted to lose the feeling of your touch… never wanted to close my eyes alone… never wanted to end it all over the phone…. and I just… can’t imagine this life without you…. but we do… we do what we have to… and we can’t ever take it back……

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I Love You

I loved my dad…. I still do… I loved him after every single fight…. Begging him to see me but he looked right through…. After every accusation and manipulation… After every painful sleepless night and devaluation… Because I thought I could love him long enough for him to change… Relived the trauma and abuse….but I…

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