everything

I couldn’t let you go…. Not for the longest time… You were always there… In the shadows and in my past… I loved a part of you… I hated the other…. In your eyes I saw someone I loved…. And someone I feared more than anything… For a time I believed in a lie… A…

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impasse

Hurts me to let you go…. You were all I ever knew and all I wanted once to know…. I held onto the past forever, frozen in a glass… But the steps I took only led me to an impossible impasse… I can’t live my life holding onto you… I can’t be free if I’m…

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never

I love… I… I loved you… Once before… But.. We stopped… And shut the door…. I fell for you… In a fantasy… And when I awoke… I knew it would… Never… Be…

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blade

those thoughts…. were drenched and soaked in suicide… those thoughts…. buried themselves deep until every part of me wished to hide…. a world and a lifetime ago… secrets he’ll never truly know…. his abuse made me want to end it all… but in those times I…. blamed myself for the fall…. I was angry… I…

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Nothing Lasts Forever

Had a thought the other day…. And my mind couldn’t think of the words you used to say…. Nothing lasts forever, even the pain faded into dust and skeletons… Love not fear now is the only medicine…. I’m walking away from the only life I’ve ever known…. Started to love myself and my old identity…

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good bye

Dear the old me…. I want to start off by saying I love you and I always will…. The pain of losing you isn’t ever lost on me…. I know it will hurt for a long time…. A part of me is dying and it feels devastating…. So much becomes lost in translation…. I didn’t…I…

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see

living with you was a dream wrapped in nightmares… my heart and soul never felt so alone… but you took away my agency to break free… and only I truly know the damage it did to me…. but the worst part of it was believing this was love…. everything upside down… where my feet never…

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