Break

Some days I’m riding a smooth glass wave, sailing curves on a calm horizon. Every thought & emotion touched by golden, flowing waters. Some nights the promise of another morning drowns me with a heavy heart, eclipsed in a dark world of helplessness. It’s only an illusion…the mind creates what we see. But in those…

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I Miss Me

I wish I could have loved myself more, instead I became obsessed with chasing vanishing dreams. Good vs. evil, hero & villain, my childhood was written in water colored, fairy tale themes. All the pain replaying  through my head, chained by this addictive sense of vivid dread. The worst of my nightmares rarely ever come…

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Empathy

I see no soul in your eyes… Eternal blackness with a smoke & mirrors disguise. I always thought it was me. Blame & guilt allied too easily. But what can I say? Power & control, But, what was your goal? There’s not just love missing from your heart, A psychopathic tendency, no compassion, no empathy,…

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Motivation

See the same look in your eyes as I did that night, shadows crossing over veiled thoughts & what I say is still left to your own interpretation. Even now, not sure if I once saw pain, desire, or simple manipulation. Grew up in a home where feelings were used as weapons & every where…

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Losing You

Count the years….& I don’t know how to face the entire loss of you. It’s just hard when I think of everything you used to put me through. Pseudo apologies in your eyes & I can’t help but to count the lies. How do you erase your father, how do you forgive your mother? Bitterness…

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Connection

I don’t want to talk about me…don’t want to draw attention to these scars. Pulling away from you to be closer to me & trying not to think about how the nightmares got this far. There’s more to the story, sometimes it’s about what wasn’t said or done. Without a connection love slowly & painful…

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Missing

Emptiness….paralyzes every emotion until I don’t feel the pain sinking too far in. A thousand moments sit on my chest & I don’t know how to break the hold despair has on me to finally win. It’s never enough….never enough because deep down I don’t believe I’m worthy of love, so I settle for paper…

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